X Factor? More like zzz factor

Talent shows; when are they never not on? It used to be a comfort travelling outside of Ireland and Britain being able to laugh at the cheapness and cruddyness of the Italian game show or Maltese variety contest. Laugh no more; for the last 8 years or so, we have been plagued by a non-stop convyor belt of 'talent' shows seemingly on all year round. In the process, Simon Cowell has become a billionaire, Piers Morgan an international star and a guy called Randy has become famous for using the word 'dog'. Spare us the life journey, the sob story, the laughing at the deluded, the pseudo-drama and the woefully short shelf life of the latest contest winner. For 'thetvreviewguy', talentless (sick) shows jumped the shark when a) the British Prime Minister appeared on one of them and b) a respected broadsheet asked that 'Dancing on Ice' (was it that one? Ed) and 'X Factor' be scheduled not to clash with one and other. The barbarians aren't just at the gates; they've crooned their way into the Keep and won't be happy until the whole edifice is torn down, ideally between 6 and 9pm. But it's just a bit of fun - like playing on the railway lines, our culture runs the risk of being smashed to smithereens by the oncoming train that is...'Unbreak My Heart'